Boys Among Men

“Brothers, I urge you to bear with my word of exhortation.” – Hebrews 13:22

God gave us daughters who need to be protected. God made fathers to protect their daughters. And one of the ways we can do this is by getting to know the young men who ask them out.

As of today, I’ve conducted a sit-down interview with my daughters’ dates somewhere between 30 and 40 times. A few of them have been what you might expect: boys nearly fainting in our living room. (These talks have a way of revealing the fact that even wimps can have good taste. Some boys who couldn’t last one round in a character contest at least have the good sense to know a great girl when they see one.)
For the most part, however, these encounters have allowed me to get to know several young men who would make their parents proud. And I’ve come away from every one of these interview experiences feeling like a real man.

Even more important, these interviews have helped spare my daughters from the predatory passions of even well-meaning boys, while also protecting them from their own human natures. As a result, Barbara and I have watched our daughters enter into marriage with their virtue, not just technically intact, but also reserved–heart, soul and body–for the man God had given them to marry.

It is one of the most important investments dads can make in our girls’ lives–challenging their boyfriends to be men, making sure they’re clear on the high value God has placed both on them and our daughters.

These young men who like what they see in our daughters need us to look them in the eyes, man to man, and hold them accountable. When you call them to high standards of personal morality, you not only protect your daughter. You help boys become men.


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