9 Facebook Tips For Married Men

When two flawed people fall in love and get married they are bound to have problems. Let them log into Facebook and the possibilities for stupid decisions are endless.

With the advent of social media a plethora of options for epic fails were introduced to an immature populace. Unfortunately, those fails go beyond cat gifs and selfies.

When two flawed people fall in love and get married they are bound to have problems. Let them log into Facebook and the possibilities for stupid decisions are endless.

Much like money (which is not inherently evil) social media serves as a conduit for the character of the user. If you consistently make wise choices and take 5 minutes to think about the consequences of your words and behavior before diving into Facebook, you’ll probably be fine. If you historically make poor choice and impulsively join the latest social platform, posting whatever you feel like for the world to see, you’re probably going to get into trouble.

It’s been said that the greatest thing about social media is that everyone has a voice. And the worst thing about social media is that everyone has a voice. An interesting dichotomy to explore for sure.

I think social media is awesome. It enables me to stay connected with friends and family regardless of distance or time. I’m not here to scare you away or create a sense of fear when it comes to Facebook.

With that in mind here are 9 Facebook Rules for Every Married Man. You can thank me later. I accept chocolate chip cookies as gratuity.

1. Share your password

I think this goes beyond Facebook, but it communicates a sense of trust. I don’t encourage snooping or demanding your wife’s password (and she should not demand yours), but volunteering it communicates your commitment and trust. If there is stuff you don’t want your wife to see, you shouldn’t be doing it.

2. Stay away from old flames

I don’t care if you’re friends now. I don’t care if you live in the same town. You can be cordial at church or Starbucks when you happen to bump into each other. Burn the digital bridge and never return.

4. Get permission

I’m pretty open and transparent (not a bad thing). I have almost no filter (not a good thing). If I was easily embarrassed there’s just too much material out there. However, LK is more reserved and private (definitely a good thing). If there’s something your wife wouldn’t appreciate, don’t share it. The security of your marriage relationship is more important than abusing your freedom of speech. Your wife needs to feel safe to be completely vulnerable (and occasionally weird) around you without worrying if she’ll end up on Facebook.

4. Do not complain about your wife

The public newsfeed is not the place to rant about your wife’s propensity to overspend or try the latest fad diet. I’m not asking you to be fake. If you’ve got a problem with your wife, talk to your wife. If you’re having issues getting through to her, talk to a trusted friend and/or get counseling. Airing her dirty laundry on Facebook is like taking out a billboard ad highlighting her faults. Not fair.

5. Keep it Classy

We don’t need to hear about how hot your wife is. No morning selfies from the bed or candid shots of her butt. Seriously. No one else wants to see that. We’re glad you think you’re wife is a bombshell. Tell her that.

6. Brag

Publicly share the wonderful traits of your beloved. Talk about her servant heart, how great a mom she is, her skill at killing moths, or how she makes you feel special and loved. Don’t lie, but there’s enough negative junk out there. By focusing on the positive and affirming her character and skills you encourage it to happen again. Not because your wife wants your next status to be about how she bleeds awesomesauce, but because it feels good to be appreciated.

7. Log out or lock up.

I’m going to guess you have good friends and a family who loves you, but most of us have fallen victim to being “hacked” because we left our Facebook open on the computer or didn’t lock our phones. There’s always that one friend/cousin who thinks it’d be hilarious to post a joke (or something blatantly inappropriate) on your behalf or that completely bombs. Avoid the damage control from the get-go.

8. Fail

This probably sounds counter-intuitive, but stick with me. None of us are the perfect husband. We make mistakes. We are going to fail. We will screw up. I’m giving you permission to bungle things. Just try not to do it twice. Apologize and create guidelines together. Grace and mercy are key tenants of any healthy marriage. Like a safety net. There when you need it, but don’t abuse it. A moment will come when you post something that is stupid in retrospect and you’ll need to apologize to your spouse. Maybe even on Facebook. That’s okay. Community can happen on social media. Own up to mucking it up and you’ll find you aren’t alone.

9. Everything in moderation

I go through phases when it comes to Facebook. Some days I’m posting a perpetual stream of content. Other times I’m silent for an entire weekend. Facebook is a lot of fun. Connecting with friends, laughing at funny memes, reading insightful articles, sharing special milestones, celebrating with family. But we easily fall into the trap of missing the moment because we’re too busy looking at our phones. Letting the world know you’re the luckiest man in town because you get to enjoy a date with your amazing wife is great. Just remember to have more face time with her than your phone. Worry about living in the moment first and sharing it later.

Facebook is a powerful tool. It has literally impacted history. People have found lost loved ones, planned concerts, built businesses, funded non-profits, etc.

The potential for awesome on Facebook is epic. But just like any power tool, you need to use it safely and sometimes with supervision.

 

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