Who is right? More importantly….who is wrong? I find myself getting caught up in this exact thing with my wife and children at time. Dennis and Barbra Rainey wrote about it in their devotional “Moments with You”:
“Why do you look at the speck that is in your brother’s eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye? MATTHEW 7:3
I’m sure you’ve had a disagreement (or more than one!) with each other that turned into a stalemate or brick wall. You didn’t really care if it came to a conclusion. You just wanted a truce. You wanted this thing behind you. You were tired of fighting.
Maybe it started with an argument about the checkbook. Maybe it had something to do with the in-laws. Maybe it was a difference of opinion on a parenting issue. But somewhere along the way, the conflict turned into much more. It took on a life of its own. Now you can hardly stand to be in the same room together.
Well, are you prepared to let reconciliation start with you? Are you ready to give up the notion that you’re mostly right? Deeper still, are you willing to strive to recapture the reality of what your marriage is all about—the transcendent beauty of reflecting God’s love on Earth? I know that you may be thinking, When I’m hurt I don’t care about God’s glory.
I just want to get even.
Don’t be ruled by your emotions. Instead, do it Jesus’ way: Take the log out of your eye. No matter what your spouse has done, no matter how misguided you think he or she has been, the key to real resolution is to start removing your log. Accept full responsibility for your part in this, and place the value of your mate and your relationship above the value of your own pride and your need to be right.
God wants more for you than being able to tolerate each other. He wants you to show forth His glory in the way you honor, love and respect each other.
Remove the logjam. And shoot for something higher.”