Against the Wind

Do you ever question your ability to be the husband that God created you to be? Alone – you might not be good enough. But with God – you are more than enough because he is more than enough. God created you to be a husband to your wife and a father to your children. With Christ – you are God’s masterpiece. You are created for his purpose, and you have all you need to do all that God wants you to do. And nothing is wasted; God will use everything in your life to fulfill his vision for you.

I wanted to share a quote from Henry Ford: “When everything seems to be going against you, remember that the airplanes takes off against the wind, not with it”


Take some time…

…this weekend to stop.

Even if it is only five minutes. TV off. Laptop closed. Smartphone away. Maybe step outside.

Just take a moment to listen. Breathe. Be thankful. Be in His presence.

“Listen to this, Job; stop and consider God’s wonders.”

Job 37:14

Are you still dating your wife?

If not, you should be.  Remember those days early on in your relationship before you were married or maybe even just after?  Remember the way it felt to have someone be the focus of all your attention, mentally, emotionally, physically?  Remember all the Corny things you would do to make her feel special or for one chance to get her to notice you?  Remember all the creative things you would do just to spend one more hour with her?  Are you still doing those things?  If you’re anything like me and have been married long enough then jobs, kids activities, and the general business of our daily lives has prevented you from continuing to date your wife, but it shouldn’t.  The enemy is very skilled at finding ways to get between you and your wife and using the daily mundane strucutre of our lives is one of his most used tools.  Well it’s time to recognize that and do something about it.  My wife and I recently sent our oldest off to college and in doing so have found a whole new schedule around our lives and are being very intentional to take a good portion of that time to ‘date’ again.

Get back that relationship you had early in your marriage or when you were courting.  Make it a priority to ‘date’ your wife.  Don’t ever give up making her feel like everyday is a new and exciting day to be in a relationship with you.  Show her how important she is by cultivating and guarding the woman that God has entrusted you with.  You know your wife better than anyone else, you know what she will like and what will work but if you need any ideas here are a few dating tips to kick start your creativity (some content of list taken from

1. Make a list of ten things your wife loves to do. Each new time you take your wife on a date, do one of those ten things as your date.

2. Do the classic date: dinner and a show. Take your wife to din­ner and to a movie she wants to watch.

3. Write a love note to your wife. Tell her all over again what she means to you.

4. Spend an evening stargazing with your wife and talking about dreams you have for the future.

5. Devote the next month to studying a book of the Bible with your wife. Take twenty minutes several nights a week to read, discuss, and pray through a shorter book such as Ephesians or Philippians.

6. Hold your wife’s hand often, in public and in private.

7. Tell your wife that you love her.  Tell your wife that Jesus loves her more than you do.  Pray with her.

8. Set a weekly date night. Each week rotate going out and stay­ing in for your date night.

9. Cancel work for the day and do something special with your wife.

10. Cut something from your schedule and use that time to date your wife.

Four Things

Your marriage won’t be successful because you have chemistry.  It won’t happen because you think you are soul mates.  It will not happen if you leave it to luck.

A successful marriage happens with you put in the effort.  A marriage works when you work at it.

Good habits and disciplines are key to achieving success.  I’ve been reading a lot lately.  I think I have four areas that we all need to concentrate on…

Praying together and trusting God – make time for it every day.  The time spent together praying for each other and your marriage will create closeness.  It helps open yourselves to God’s presence.

Resolve the negative feelings – the feelings of frustration and anger are not sinful even the Bible says that Jesus got angry.  Letting these feelings simmer inside will allow them to become toxic.  A successful marriage allows for negative feelings to be discussed.  Holding them in does nothing to help you achieve oneness.

Have fun together and become best friends – think back to the fun that you used to have when you met.  Mix it up.  Take turns doing something that the other likes.  Schedule a regular date and stick to it.  Marriage can be hard work, so go have some fun together!

Build relationships with other believers – these types of relationships will challenge you to be a better Christian.  It will inspire you to center yourself and your marriage on Christ.  Join a small group at your church.

It takes about 45 to 60 days for a new habit to become part of your daily cycle.  Pick the area that your marriage can benefit from the most….and get started!  It can only help!

Make it your mission…..

“There’s a direct correlation between the accuracy of our memory and the effectiveness of our mission. If we’re not teaching people how to be saved, it’s perhaps because we’ve forgotten the tragedy of being lost. If we’re not teaching the message of forgiveness, it may be because we don’t remember what it was like to be guilty. And if we’re not preaching the cross, it could be that we’ve subconsciously decided that—God forbid—somehow we don’t need it.” – Max Lucado

Max Lucado has a much deeper message about remember Jesus Christ when times get hard or fear creeps in; however these words reminded me how easily we can overlook our marriage. If we are not pursuing our wives, it may be because we don’t remember what it was like to be without her. It is easy to say that we would have regrets if it all came to an end tomorrow; and then we do very little about it.

What would you miss? Make a list. Share it with your wife; and the makes those changes today.

Be Strong. Act Like Men.

What’s your calling?

Elijah and Jonah

Both prophets. Both call by God. Different responses.

God called Elijah to confront Ahab. He went. God called Jonah to confront the Ninevites. He ran.

What is God calling you to do in your marriage? As a father?

Are you walking toward God? Are you walking away? You can only be doing one.

Have you ever considered what God is calling you to do? Sure – you could say that God hasn’t “called” you to do anything, but the magnitude of your calling depends on what you call it. Your marriage could be your calling. Maybe you disagree; however whatever you call it…that’s what it is going to be. I suggest that we – as husbands – examine what God calls us to do in Ephesians 5.

Is it hard? Yes. Is it always fair and balanced? No. Will it help you achieve the marriage that God intends for you? I am willing to bet – yes. We need to stop calling it like we see it because God calls it differently because He knows what it can be.

Love you wife like Christ loved the church; and then let God handle the rest.

In case you are not familiar with the story of Jonah; then I will share this….Jonah ran, but he could not out run what God called him to do.

Be Strong. Act Like Men.